GOOD MEN ARE GOOD TROUBLEMAKERS

Not all women are allies. And not all men are the enemy.

That sentence might make some people uncomfortable.

Good.

Because LOUDER GIRL isn't about making people comfortable.

It's about telling the truth.

If we believe every woman automatically supports equality simply because she's a woman, we're fooling ourselves.

If we believe every man wants to control women simply because he's a man, we're doing exactly what patriarchy taught us to do:

Reduce human beings to stereotypes.

Neither belief unites us.

Patriarchy isn't men. It's a system.

And good people of every gender can challenge it.

I USED TO HATE MEN

For 35 years, I jokingly called myself President of the Man-Haters Club.

It wasn't really a joke.

Growing up, my experiences taught me that men weren't safe.

So, I believed they couldn't be trusted.

And when you believe something long enough...

You start seeing evidence of it everywhere.

That belief shaped how I moved through the world.

Until it didn't.

Earlier this year I shared my healing journey in my two-part series:

If You're Silent, You're Not an Ally: What Ignited Leadership Looks Like for Men. (Part 1 and Part 2)

Healing changed me.

My husband, David, changed me.

Having our son Jack changed me.

Little by little, fear gave way to trust.

Not because men suddenly became perfect.

Because I finally saw something I'd been unable to see before.

Photo of David & Jack

There are men doing the work.

There are men choosing courage over comfort.

There are men causing good trouble.

DAVID ISN'T THE ONLY ONE

David supports women every day.

He champions LOUDER GIRL.

He celebrates women through his photography, social media, and the quiet choices he makes every day.

But David isn't unique.

Over the past year, I've discovered an incredible community of men refusing to accept the stories patriarchy tells them about masculinity.

They're challenging misogyny.

Teaching boys differently.

Supporting women publicly.

Speaking up when it would be easier to stay quiet.

That's Ignited Leadership.

MEN CAUSING GOOD TROUBLE

Helping Men Better Support Women

Jesse Robertson — Husbands for Menopause

Helping husbands understand menopause and becoming better partners instead of confused bystanders.

Michael Hunter — Upspiral Life

Uses neuroscience to help people reclaim their lives while celebrating women in midlife, reminding us that:

Perimenopause isn't the end. It's the awakening.

Real masculinity isn't threatened by strong women.

It celebrates them.

Redefining Masculinity

Dustin Pace — Non-Toxic Masculinity

His message?

Read books.

Lift weights.

Fight fascism.

Become a better man.

Instead of recommending J.D. Vance's Communion, he encourages men to read the original inspiration:

bell hooks' Communion: The Female Search for Love.

Chris Kratzer

Former evangelical pastor.

Author of Leatherbound Terrorism and Stupid Shit Heard in the Church.

Truth teller.

His work helps people escape religious systems built on shame, fear, and domination.

His message:

You don't have to lose yourself to find faith.

Hugh Hollowell

Writer.

Pastor.

Hope dealer.

His newsletter, Life Is Beautiful, reminds readers that goodness still exists and that another world is possible.

Calling Out Harm

Some allies don't just support women.

They challenge men.

Ian Lightfoot

Creator of the viral series:

"Famous Male Abusers Who Still Haven't Been Canceled as Much as a Woman Who Doesn't Smile Enough."

He's also behind the citizen journalism project:

Famous Male Abusers

because silence protects abuse.

Truth creates accountability.

Being an ally isn't about saying you're a feminist.

It's about what you do when it costs you something.

FOR MEN READY TO REWRITE THE STORY 

If men want to become better allies, here's a great place to start.

• The Guy's Guide to Feminism — Michael Kaufman & Michael Kimmel 
• The Will to Change — bell hooks 
• How Not to Be a Boy — Robert Webb 

Photo of the book "How Not to Be a Boy" by Robert Webb

Each challenges the stories boys inherit about masculinity and offers a healthier path forward.

HONORABLE GOOD TROUBLEMAKERS

Eddie Vedder

"...if you feel like you've got a piece of duct tape on your mouth... take it off, speak up, speak your mind, shout it out..." 

Javier Bardem

"We are killing women because some men think they own them."

He reminds us that violence against women isn't a women's issue.

It's a men's issue.

Denmark's Men's National Soccer Team

In 2024, Denmark's men's national team gave up a pay raise so the women's team could receive equal match fees.

That's what solidarity looks like.

Andy Murray

One of the strongest male advocates for equality in sports.

"Women should have equal pay. One hundred percent."

THIS IS WHAT IGNITED LEADERSHIP LOOKS LIKE

We don't create a better world by replacing one "us versus them" story with another.

We create it by finding people willing to rewrite the story.

Women.

Men.

Young people.

Older people.

Anyone willing to choose courage over comfort.

Anyone willing to share power instead of hoard it.

Anyone willing to speak up when silence would be easier.

Because patriarchy doesn't just limit women.

It limits everyone.

And every person who refuses to play by its rules...

is a Good Troublemaker.

Join the FREE LOUDER GIRL Community of Good Troublemakers

A place where women:

• Cause Good Trouble
• Get support
• Tell their stories, share their truths

When You Join, You'll Receive:

LoudHer Inspirations Newsletter

Weekly sparks of courage, storytelling, self-love, and Ignited Leadership.

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A community where you are seen, heard, valued, and celebrated.